Sickness
Even illness is a gift because sickness necessitates slowing down (Gift #487). Our crazy, hectic pace of life since the whole moving saga began has kept me from getting adequate rest and has had me shoving my healthful eating goals aside to focus on what seemed to be more urgent. When we neglect the body, it will get sick, especially during one of the most severe winters, interspersed with a few 70 degree days here and there, so my hectic lifestyle came to a rapid halt over the past few weeks as laryngitis, flu-like viruses, tendonitis, and ear infections have assaulted me. Thankfully, the worst of it came during spring break when I could sleep in (Gift #488), and that rest time has done wonders not only for my body, but for my mind and soul.
Strep throat, tendonitis,
Then came laryngitis.
And now it seems I have the flu.
Humbled now, I confess
That I may need more rest
Even I can get run down too.
Kids
Now that the kids are getting older, their quotes are not as cute as they were before when the humor arose out of their childishness. Now the things they say make them sound a little too wise in their own eyes for the own good.
When negotiating for a new Lego organizer caddy, our son offered to pay half. Then when he handed me the cash, he also handed me a tooth the tooth fairy (who has felt deathly ill lately) failed to come get the night before in exchange for cash. Since he was "entitled" to tooth fairy money, he assumed he could pay me $5 less. I think he's on to me, no? At least he's learning to negotiate. (Gift #489)
The kids are reaching that age where they think they know everything about everything. Our 9-year-old, who has never been car shopping or even priced cars on-line, said to me while I drove past a neighbor's house, "He has a very expensive car."
So I asked, "Why do you think his car is so expensive?"
She answered, "Because it only has one door on each side."
Then we passed a very old Volkswagon Beetle.
So I said, "That VW bug must be very expensive according to your logic."
She refuted, "Oh no! It's not expensive because it is so small. To be expensive, it has to have one door on each side and be really long, yet only fit two people inside, and if those two people have to lay on their backs to fit inside (like my classmate's dad's Lamborghini), then it is REALLY expensive."
Some days the kids ask really deep, thought provoking spiritual questions. Then on other days like last Sunday, the 7-year-old merely wanted to know, "Will there be newspaper carriers who deliver the comics every Sunday morning during the Millennial Reign?" At least he is looking toward that glorious appearing and assured of his salvation! (Gift #490)
It is always a gift when the kids' comments lead to profound spiritual discussions. (Gift #491) While listening to the song, "Keep Making Me" by Sidewalk Prophets, my daughter listened to the first line, "Make me broken, so I can be healed" and said, "But I don't want to be broken; I just want to be healed."
And I explained how that is the great paradox of Christianity. Human nature wants to do good works to glorify self instead of God. We want the blessings without the brokenness. We want heaven without a Savior. We want to be clean without acknowledging that our dirty hands nailed Jesus on the cross or that our filthy lips spat on his face. We want a mirage of freedom with our selfish will in control when true freedom is yielding all control to the risen Lord who is good and righteous and possessor of all. We want prosperity without the gospel which is why Joel Osteen and Joyce Meyer are growing filthy rich while their followers are left spiritually empty. When we want anything else except more of Jesus, I told her, we will never be filled.
I'm always concerned when the UN Convention on the Rights of a Child gains momentum in America or when Planned Parenthood International issues another piece of propaganda which elevates the authority of the children over that of their parents in matters both at home and in government. These upside down arguments seek to cripple parents from teaching their children the way that is good and right and from training their children to become responsible, effective stewards of limited resources and faithful contributors to society.
18 "Fix these words of mine in your hearts and minds; tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. 19 Teach them to your children, talking about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. 20 Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates." (Deuteronomy 11: 18-20)My concerns were amusingly justified (although much graver, dangerous examples from around the world could be used as justification) this past week when the kids decided to take over the legislation and enforcement within our family. My husband was been arrested by the ACF (Adults & Children Fighting/Federation) for requiring our son to do his chores before playtime could commence, and the enforcement officer (our daughter) forged my signature as a witness on his arrest warrant. Effective parenting becomes a crime, and forgery becomes legal when kids make the rules. Supporters of the UNCRC take note!
I can't complain too much about my daughter, however, because she recently noticed that my laptop was on fire and alerted my husband and me before our new house burned down. (Gift #492)
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| The rag that started the fire |
Trying to parent two kids who are polar opposites reminds of Goldilocks and the Three Bears. Each parent's natural parenting style does not fit that child, so when he or she finally figures out what motivates and works for child 1, child 2 comes along and finds those parenting techniques too extreme in the opposite direction from that child's natural bent. By the time the parent figurse out what works for child 2, child 1 has entered a new stage making the old techniques too [whatever adjective applies here], and so the yo-yo continues. To those who have a 3rd child, does the 3rd child finally fit your parenting style "just right" or do you simply stop trying at that point? While I fail to ever get it right, I am at least thankful for the way these parenting challenges stretch and refine us for the purpose of making us more like Jesus who always got it right but endured more suffering than anyone can possibly fathom in the process. (Gift #493)
Trying to parent effectively when laryngitis and achilles tendonitis rendered me unable to walk or talk had me empathizing with the dark knight in that horrible and crude Monty Python film guys like to reference. As he remained determined to do his duty even when his limbs were severed, so I had too learned to persevere and find other ways to communicate. At least I did not yell at the kids that week (Gift #494) while broadening my communication skills (Gift #495).
In addition to not eating or sleeping as well as I should during the chaotic period since the move, I have also struggled to find time to lift weights as I had done regularly for years. While my husband was out of town on business leaving all the "tucking in" responsibilities to me, I received the motivation I needed to make strength training a higher priority. (Gift #496) Physical touch is my growing 7-year-old's #1 love language, so I carried him in my arms up the stairs and to his bed to be tucked into bed. His contented grins from ear to ear and his sweet questioning, "Am I too heavy yet?" as I carried him melted my heart in such a way that I am now determined to stay strong enough to carry that boy up those stairs until he is bigger than I am.
I was flattered recently when a neighborhood kid defined my role as a mother.
An 8-year-old boy asked me, "What do you like to do during your free time?"
I responded, "What free time? I don't have any, but if I did, I would enjoy..."
Then the boy's brother interrupted me saying, "I know what your hobbies are. Your hobbies are cooking and cleaning and taking care of kids."
Apparently our family chores mandate is not overly common, as I recently overheard the following conversation between my kids and those same two boys:
My kids to friend: We can't come out and play until we're done with our chores.
8-year-old boy: I don't have any chores. I'm totally free. This is America, land of the free.
My 9-year-old: Yes, but the economics book Mom made me read says there is no such thing as a free lunch.
Thank you, Lord, for helping my kids at least understand that chores have a purpose (Gift #497). Please help them to some day appreciate our efforts to teach them through chores.
I have been praying specifically for my relationship with my kids and for ways to stop the cycle of disrespect. Then God answered that prayer exactly with an "A-ha" moment through the Love and Respect in the Family ministry. (Gift #498) You know all those love and respect sermons we have heard that provide the foundation for a healthy marriage (Ephesians 5:24-26). Well, the Bible applies the same principle to parenting. Parents must show love to their children (not the agape love all parents feel, but expressing love in ways children can feel), while children are to honor/respect their parents. When children don't FEEL loved (despite all the ways parents may attempt to show love), they will not obey or respect their parents which makes parents respond in ways that seem unloving to their children and so the cycle continues...just as it does in marriages when husbands fail to love their wives or when wives disrespect their husbands. Applying love and respect principles can revolutionize the family, so I'm posting this link as a reminder to proactively show love to my kids in tangible ways even when I feel so disrespected I want to run far, far away.
Weather Woes
I'm not sure where the gift is in all the winter weather we have had this year. Even the kids are tired of school closings. My hometown got hammered by ice storms with some residents out of power for over a week. It was brutal. The weather certainly reminded us that we don't know what the next day will bring and must trust in the Lord moment by moment, day by day. Selfishly, I am thankful that we did not get that degree of ice, for every new tree planted in our new lot would likely be dead by now. Still my heart goes out to our family members who lost power and beautiful trees and will be waiting for weeks for tree service and for all the school kids who will making up school days instead of enjoying a spring break.
I have loved the few days of spring weather we did get to experience in between massive winter storms. Of course, with all the snow and ice, the greenway was flooded in multiple areas when residents tried to get out on the trail and enjoy the sunshine.
I have loved the few days of spring weather we did get to experience in between massive winter storms. Of course, with all the snow and ice, the greenway was flooded in multiple areas when residents tried to get out on the trail and enjoy the sunshine.
Coming
across this flooded section in the Greenway today and debating whether
or not to try to cross to the other side reminded me of a wise old
mentor, Father Henry.
When I studied at Oxford University one summer, I
lodged at St. Benet's Hall where a
small-framed, quiet, composed monk named Father Henry served as
headmaster. Two other students and I got to know a totally different
side of Father Henry when he offered to go running with us every weekday
morning at 5am. Underneath the dark brown cloak and elder visage was a
chiseled athlete who craved adventure. He asked if we wanted to take
the scenic route around Oxford while he shared enlightening historical
information and amusing stories about the area. The scenic route usually
involved jumping fences, dodging cattle, sheep, or the occasional
peacock, swimming across the Thames, and running across very rough
terrain over a distance of never less than six miles. Father Henry
would be very disappointed in me if I let this tiny obstacle stand in my
way. I'm just so thankful for the lessons he taught me. (Gift #499)
Despite the flooding, the lake was still lovely to gaze upon while biking the greenway around it.
While the topsy-turvy weather patterns do not help me combat pervasive viruses, I was just so thankful for the reminder that spring is coming. I experience God best out in nature, so I am always grateful for any day pleasant enough to venture outside. (Gift #500)
Despite the flooding, the lake was still lovely to gaze upon while biking the greenway around it.
House
Progress has slowed on our home improvement projects as we are losing steam. Thankfully, my mom and aunt are still energized about helping us decorate and have made multiple trips to help us hang pictures and curtains and add accent pieces. I'm so thankful for their support (Gift #501) and for the simple way in which they love spending time together. It does my heart good to hear them giggling like silly school girls when they work together. (Gift #502 )
I've been trying to sell furniture from our old house since late December 2013. Those ads got me lots of interested emails, but no one actually came to look at the furniture. Then this past Thursday, I updated my previous listing for dining room furniture and added listings for 3 chairs, an ottoman and a sofa table. All these items old this past weekend to very kind people who I know will take great care of the furniture. (Gift #503) Many of the pieces belonged to my late grandparents who went to great expense to select only the highest quality pieces and then took extremely great care of the furniture. Every piece was in better condition (even the pieces that were 64 years old) than solid furniture I bought when we moved in which already have chips and nicks and scratches. The three chairs and ottoman are now being used in a church prayer room, so it is especially gratifying to know the furniture is serving the cause of Christ. (Gift #504) Even after donating some of the furniture to the church, we now have enough cash to offset the new fainting sofa we needed for our master bedroom and the ottoman that matches the leather sectional we just purchased. (Gift #505) We must be patient, however, because this furniture was special ordered and may take 3-4 weeks to finally arrive.
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| We're hoping to add one of my MIL's bird themed paintings over the toilet to complete this room. |
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| Mom helped me find a sconce and bench to complete that wall. |
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| Mom set up the table and server decor. |
Not having any of our seating furniture in the media/play room was awkward for viewing the ACC tournament this weekend. I suggested that we bring up the upholstered chair and ottoman from our bedroom, but my husband thought our daughter's turquoise lounger is more his style. I love how easy-going this man can be. (Gift #506)
School
The discipline policies at our kids' school somehow enable even the most hyper child to sit quietly in each of the 4 specific positions at the right times, show utmost respect for everyone, and consistently use refined manners that seem to have become extinct everywhere else. (Gift #507) So, when the students in my daughter's class brought in swords and rifles for Civil War enactments, nothing went amiss. I just received word that every student in my son's class must bring in a hammer tomorrow for Colonial Day. 21 hammers in the hands of 21 first graders..and I'm the only one running worst case scenarios in my mind. Clearly, we are still newbies at the school. The hammers were used to punch nails into tin for colonial style tin art. The kids also made butter, children's games, chalk boards, and misc. other colonial period items. Colonial Day was a huge success, but I did not get to go, so I can't share photos. The parents did a fabulous job with every booth. (Gift #508)
More dedicated parents also pulled off a phenomenal Energy Day for our daughter's grade, (Gift #509) and I was so pleased to see my daughter having fun at the school she once loathed and bonding with so many wonderful new friends (Gift #510).
Throwback Thursdays
Just for fun, I thought I would share a few photos here that I shared on Facebook for Throwback Thursdays.
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| Cross Country 1990 |
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| Circa 1979 |
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| Dad's very short lived moustache |
Our rascally rabbit continues to get into heaps of trouble making me furious one moment, and then he has me laughing or at least smiling the next. His utter selfishness is a daily reminder that only humans were made in God's image to serve and not be served. (#511) Still, I am more than ready for spring to arrive so he can permanently move outside into his hutch.
The kids had fun dressing him up in sunglasses on one rare sunny day, and I could not help but think of Corey Hart's lisp as he sang, "I wear my sunglasses at night".
It's much too sunny
For our spoiled bunny.
The sun is so bright
He's got to wear shades!
I'm so thankful for all the many spiritual encouragements I have received lately (Gift #512) and even more so for the opportunity to help lead a friend I have not seen since high school in his journey toward coming to Christ. (Gift #513) I am so thankful that he contacted me out of the blue with his questions, and I pray God will give me the wisdom to answer His questions in a way that keeps leading him to Christ. The way our Lord pursues each of us is so beautiful. (Gift #514)
Max Lucado expounding on the woman at the well (John 4: 19-20):When I had strep, I had to miss church while in quarantine, so I streamed a sermon on-line. That was possibly the best sermon with the most life changing applications that I have ever heard providing yet another gift through sickness. (Gift #515) One quote from that sermon that I still remember word for word is:
"'Let me tell you where I really hurt', she is saying. 'Let me tell you what keeps me awake at night. Not the rejection. I'm used to being lonely. I can stand having no husband. What I cannot stand is not knowing where God is. Can you tell me?'...A hungry heart finding the Father's feast. A searching soul finding the Father's face. A wandering pilgrim spotting the Father's house. Finding God. Finding God seeking us. This is worship. This is a worshiper."
"Our pain amplifies our testimony more than our blessings......the degree to which we understand Jesus' love and victory is the degree to which we can endure suffering." - J.D. Greear speaking on Acts 6
Friendship
It was such a gift to get to host a college friend for an early breakfast before her business meetings began this past weekend. (Gift #516) She and I were in Bible studies together since our freshman year and were very involved in college ministries on campus and at church together while also both actively serving in the scholar's program at our university. She is one of the few people who knew about my feelings for the guy who would eventually become my husband when he and I first met 22 years ago. The following photo was taken before she arrived as we were preparing breakfast. She lit up this place with her vibrant smile and unquenchable passion for Jesus. (Gift #517)
One of the biggest takeaways from our conversation concerned how lonely we as women tend to feel after getting married and having children. Yes, being newly married and becoming a new mom are seasons for focusing on your husband and your children and most importantly for learning to rely on Jesus to fill your emotional needs, seeking Him first instead of calling your BFFs.
Yet, Christian women still need each other to encourage and sharpen each other, as iron sharpens iron. Sadly, our loneliness is often the result of our own unwillingness to reach out because we have been wounded (often by slander) at some point, even within the church body, and assume no one would ever want to spend time with us. I said to this dear sister in Christ, "It was probably my own lack of effort to reach out,
but isn't is sad how our preconceived ideas or notions (often out of our
own insecurities) can keep us from spending time with those we love." We made a commitment to be the ones to risk rejection to put ourselves out there for the sake of loving others and to build each other up when the enemy attacks. Godly friendships are too sacred and too vital for both spiritual growth and emotional stability to let foolish mind games and petty fears keep us from meeting together.
24 And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds, 25 not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching. (Hebrews 10: 24-25)
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