Go and make disciples, teaching them to obey God's word

The women's ministry for whom I write is doing a devotional series on the great commission (Matthew 28:19-20). To equip and inspire us to make disciples, we've been examining the life and ministry of Jesus as our example.  Learning God’s word, teaching others His truth, and helping others learn how to study and apply God’s word are vital to discipleship. My contribution to this series was a devotion on Matthew 13 in which Jesus teaches through eight parables. Let’s consider the familiar who, what, where, when, what, how, and why questions as we explore this passage.   
 

In Matthew 13, we find Jesus teaching the crowds along the shore of the Sea of Galilee.  The who includes Jesus, His disciples who had left everything to follow Him, and a crowd of curious bystanders.  The what in this chapter are the truths of the kingdom of Heaven. Broadly, the what encompasses all of Scripture. The where in this chapter was inside a boat, a safe distance from the mob but close enough to be heard, along the shore of the Sea of Galilee where large crowds gathered to hear Him.  Jesus taught God’s absolute truth to all who followed Him, and He made disciples wherever he went.  

Matthew 12 provides the when for Matthew 13. These events occurred on the Sabbath, later in the day after a busy morning of traveling to the synagogue with His disciples, teaching the crowds in the synagogue and wherever he journeyed next, repeatedly refuting the Pharisees’ charges against Him, and healing many people.  On that same Sabbath day, Jesus left the house and sat down by the Sea of Galilee (Matthew 13:1). I presume that He went there to find a peaceful, quiet place to pray and decompress after the exhausting events earlier that day. 

 The view of the Sea of Galilee from Peter's house which may be similar to the scene in Matthew 13 

Any solitude He may have sought did not last long, however, because great crowds gathered around Him causing Him to move to the boat where He continued teaching once again.   Jesus was faithful to make disciples whenever the opportunity arose.  He did not organize a formal speaking/travel schedule six months in advance as modern itinerant speakers tend to do.  He surrendered His schedule, His home, and His convenience entirely to the Father’s will.  He took time to get alone with God and pray, but being available to make disciples always took priority over His personal preferences or comfort.

College students who attended Bible studies I hosted, curious classmates whose faith had been challenged by professors, advisors, co-workers, managers, neighbors, friends I met at the gym, childhood friends reunited through Facebook, cashiers, drug addicts, battered women, women in crisis pregnancy situations, long lost relatives, my students at school, and my children come to mind as examples of those who have entered my life for the greater purposes of learning God’s word and growing in discipleship.  Who have I missed because I was too busy, too distracted, or too tired to notice?  When have I been too selfish with my time to make myself available for discipleship relationships? Have I been listening to the Lord enough to go where people are waiting to receive kingdom truths? Who has God sent to you for discipleship in the truth?  Are you faithfully teaching them God’s word whenever and wherever the Lord leads?

How did Jesus teach His followers in Matthew 13?  He taught them patiently and lovingly through the use of parables.  As a teacher, I have tried to incorporate practical l life applications and true stories that would interesting or familiar to my students to paint parallels to both Biblical truth and to the academic lesson for that day.  Parables bridge students’ understanding of current knowledge to new precepts being taught.  Whenever students encounter the familiar scene used in the parable, they are often reminded of the analogous spiritual truth.  

Knowledge builds upon itself, but if there is no foundation of faith to which new spiritual truth can attach, understanding is hindered (vs. 10-17).  Thus, many in the crowd, including His chosen disciples, could not understand the parables.  Lest the enemy snatch up the words of truth (vs. 19), Jesus steadfastly and patiently answered their questions, often with another parable.  He did not hastily spoon feed them facts like schoolteachers are tempted to do before a test deadline. Instead, he offered thoughtful explanations to build understanding and help them think at a deeper level, so that the truths would take root permanently. 

We’re more likely to be patient disciple-makers if we first pray for God to prepare those we train to receive His truth.  We must be faithful to equip others while trusting God to bring forth the fruit, even to a hundredfold (Matthew 13: 23).  Ask in faith that the word of God in them will be like the mustard seed which grew tall and strong, providing shelter, strength, and wisdom to others while expanding the kingdom of Heaven like leaven in flour (vs. 12, 31-33).

^”And so, from the day we heard, we have not ceased to pray for you, asking that you may be filled with the knowledge of his will in all spiritual wisdom and understanding, so as to walk in a manner worthy of the Lord, fully pleasing to him, bearing fruit in every good work and increasing in the knowledge of God.“ (Colossians 1: 9-10)

Answering the why questions should inspire more faithfulness in making disciples.  The first answer is simply because Jesus commanded us to equip and to teach believers.  Secondly, as heirs of God’s kingdom and stewards of His great treasures, it’s a joyful privilege and a blessing to help others grow in God’s wisdom.  These truths, which had been hidden since the earth was formed (vs. 35) but have now been entrusted to us, are of immeasurable worth (vs. 44-46).  The prophets and saints before us longed to see, hear, and know the truths we now have (vs. 17).  We also make disciples to bless others (vs. 16, 51-52). Finally, we train others in the word of God out of loving compassion, for the harvest day is coming when the angels will separate the evil from the righteous, and the wicked will be punished forever.  (vs. 36-43 and 47-50).  Love should compel and energize us, just as it drove Jesus throughout His ministry, even during His agonizing death on the cross for us.  As we make disciples, teaching them to know, love, and obey God and His word, we are impacting the kingdom of God forever and fulfilling our God given purpose.

Making Hard Decisions When God's Will Isn't Immediately Clear

I've been struggling since last March over whether or not to continue teaching STEM next year. I love the students.  I love learning.  I love the life lessons that flow from it.  I'm passionate about bringing STEM enrichment to our school and want my life to count most of all.  Teaching is fulfilling in the sense of doing something that has value, but some days I wonder what I'm doing in the classroom with no teacher training and no expertise on classroom management. All I have is a love for STEM, kids, and the STEM methodologies I employ, for the way they ignite a love for learning and appeal to non-traditional learners.  But I'm not very efficient at lesson planning, and I never know when to stop improving my lessons.  I always have that oppressive, nagging stress of having to plan the next lesson, and I rarely do anything on weekends because I'm so wrapped up in lesson planning.  I never have the sense or verbal affirmation that I am a good teacher, so I keep trying harder and harder.  The parents have expressed great gratitude for all my efforts, but that just makes me feel guilty when I consider quitting.  I'm hoping just giving up tutoring will free up more time, but the engineering job I love is taking up more and more time as well.

I struggled with guilt over enjoying my consulting/engineering job so much and fearing I was taking the easy, worldly road instead of the seemingly more fruitful road of teaching.  I'm hard on myself and tend to think I'm supposed to do whatever is the hardest instead of what is the easiest. That pattern is evident throughout my life.  Almost every decision we make for our kids has been the harder one on us but with the highest potential for long term benefit for them.

I have received some very positive feedback recently at work for modest efforts compared to the grueling efforts I put into teaching, yet teaching is such a thankless job. I spend all year begging the school to let me implement just one small change (because no one who is better equipped to do it will do it and because lack of funding is the excuse for every new idea), yet at my job where I use my strengths on a regular basis without needing to put in so much effort, I am rewarded and appreciated for nearly ever little idea I suggest.  Even so, if I am seeking the approval or man or vain flattery to stroke my ego instead of seeking only to please God, then the job is bad for my heart, bad for my pride, and not what I should be doing.

So my prayer partners have been praying with me over the decision, given that I don't feel like I can do both, or certainly not do both to my standard of excellence without my family suffering as a result.  My husband prefers that I be at the school, but during my years of teaching/tutoring, he has had to pull a lot of weight at home because I've been too busy with lesson plans and student events to take care of my duties as wife/mom.  Today, our church published a devotion I had spent over 10 hours writing last week about wives submitting to their husbands (based on Vashti & Xerxes in Esther 1), so I know I should submit to him.  Yet he hasn't insisted that I work at the school.  He just wants me to keep my focus on the kids, which is wise indeed, for they will be gone before I know it, and I don't want to miss out any opportunities to sow into their hearts.

Then a wise mentor advised me to do what brings the most fulfillment, not necessarily the most happiness.  That's tough because no matter where I work or serve, if I do it for the glory of God, then He will bring eternal fruit out of it, but I feel most fulfilled in relationships with others.  When teaching STEM, I connect in some part with the young students, but not so much with other adults, and I much prefer to work with adults where we can talk on a deeper level - applying God's truth to critical life issues, sharpening one another as iron sharpens iron. I connect more easily with adults, but I did find some of those connections with high school & college aged students, so I know I'm supposed to work with that age in some capacity at some point, be it as a bible study leader or Sunday School teacher or just being involved with athletics programs in which my kids participate.

But the connections I have at my engineering job are different, deeper, richer, and more diverse.  The practical aspects of the job make it the clear choice in the eyes of the world, and make me seem a fool to give it up, but I must always remember that man's wisdom is foolishness in the eyes of God, and God's wisdom is foolishness in the eyes of man.

¹⁸ Do not deceive yourselves. If any of you think you are wise by the standards of this age, you should become “fools” so that you may become wise. ¹⁹ For the wisdom of this world is foolishness in God’s sight. As it is written: “He catches the wise in their craftiness”; ²⁰ and again, “The Lord knows that the thoughts of the wise are futile.”  (1 Corinthians 3:18-20)

This particular workplace is unlike any other with the rare benefits of a relaxed, encouraging, team building environment, flexibility to manage oneself, strong support staff, opportunity to travel across the state in a consultative role meeting people from all walks of life without going too far to necessitate an overnight stay, so I'm home with my family in the evenings, an inner circle of like minded people who meet to pray for our country and our co-workers during lunch off site, a full scale health and wellness program, fun co-workers, and potential for full-time employment when the kids are older.

When I left my career to stay home with the kids full time, I never thought I could return to my original career field, given that the industry is always changing and my technological savvy has dwindled over the years, so to have the opportunity to pick back up where I left off but with more of an engineering/process improvement focus, which is more my wheelhouse, is a miracle.  Part-time engineering jobs are few and far between, but with this job, I get to practically set my own hours, depending upon need and my own availability, so I've been averaging just under10 hours a week when most convenient for me.  It really is the perfect scenario.

Then when my husband enrolled our son in Pop Warner football (two hour practices every day) and both kids added an extra music lesson each week, I considered how much busier the kids and I will be (not just our kids but other students I had anticipated would want to take my STEM class), I sensed the number of students available to take my STEM class would be lower this year. My own son would not have the time, and he's the reason I started the program in the first place.

So, I have been discussing other options with the administration for including STEM as part of the regular school day while adding small Olympiad type clubs for the few students who cannot get enough STEM enrichment.  I committed to helping out with new programming, but I declined to continue in the all consuming role as administrator, developer, and teacher who also handled all the registrations, accounting, equipment purchasing, lab set up and clean up, marketing, facility rental, curriculum writing, etc.

My heart sunk as I considered all the fun we had last year, so I went to work today feeling conflicted.  I had shared with my prayer partners the night before about how much better my relationships have become with my children...connecting on a deeper level with more mature conversations and less drama.  One friend said, "Maybe your new job where you are being fulfilled (maybe she meant utilizing my God given strengths and bents) is affecting your attitude and the joy you experience in parenting."  Bam! I had never considered that leaving my children to go do something outside of the home could make me a better parent, but oh how I need the escape..not every day of course, but one or two days a week makes for a nice break, and I do think about my kids while I travel to/from work or client sites.  I think about ways to love them better, and I usually come home energized and happy.  When I taught at the kids' school, I came home and crashed on the couch not wanting to look at another kid until I had slept at least six hours.

Then today I had the most awesome workday. I got to travel with my favorite like-minded coworker, and we shared openly about about our fears and our faith.  Being politically minded in this day and age can certainly wreak havoc on the spirit as the truth of our nation's utter corruption and eminent demise is ugly indeed. As I drove, I shared so many treasures stored up in my heart. She didn't mind my rambling, though, for she was truly listening and ministering back to me. All the related scriptures I've memorized in the past came to remembrance and poured out, encouraging us both..  So much wisdom teachers and mentors have given me over the years, and life lessons I taught my STEM students came to mind just when we both seemed to need them most.

We talked a little about the Black Lives Matter movement and the all out assault on police officers kicking off a sort of civil war in our country during our drive.  I tried to infuse hope into every word I spoke instead of my more typical "Obama raised this terrorist organization in our own nation to destroy us" type rants. Even though I was trying to encourage her, I was actually encouraging myself in the process and being reminded of how much I need to fill my heart with God's truth to push back so much of the negativity flooding the headlines.

When we walked into the restaurant recommended by our clients, we saw two police officers in uniform sitting with a large group of people not in uniform, but we assumed if they were eating with policemen, they were supportive of men in blue, too. I told my co-worker that I wanted to buy those policemen lunch, and she was all in. On that extremely rare occasion, I actually had some cash, just two larger bills. So I asked our waitress to put one of my large bills in with the check she brought to the police officer's table and to tell them someone wanted to say thank you to the police officers for serving, but not to let them know who.  We wondered if the lady would really do it or pocket the cash. We talked like we weren't paying any attention to the police officer's table, but I think the waitress did exactly as we asked her, and she came back later, beaming about how much they appreciated it.

Then I got to thinking....those police officers and everyone at their table were white.  This town we were in seemed old school and more segregated compared to where I live where white Americans are the minority. Our waitress was black. Both my business partner and I are white. She may have assumed we only appreciate white people, so I pulled out the other bill (same amount as I gave the police officers and same amount she would have pocketed had she not been trustworthy) and added that to her usual tip with a note of thanks. My friend and I were both glowing because it just feels good to bless someone. I'm not the spontaneous Random Acts of Kindness type person, though I certainly have wanted to be more aware of ways to serve others, so this was all a God thing. 

I now have no money in my wallet, but my heart is so full. I don't actually bring home any money after paying taxes, giving tithes & offerings, and paying a nanny, so today was a net negative for me financially, but the internal blessings are immeasurable.  

Anxieties overwhelm us when we feel like we have no control over what's happening in the world and when evil seems to be grabbing little victories.  Even though we know God has won the war, the little battles sent to wake up the world to their need for Christ can make us feel beaten.   But we can make a difference, pushing back hate right where we are, simply by loving others near us with simple acts of kindness and generosity.   How can we be anxious when we just cheered up six hearts today with less than what a counseling session with therapist would cost?

All the way back we talked some more, and we both realized how much God had ministered to us both that day.  She filled my love tank, and I think God worked through me to help her. What if I had been silent about my faith as the politically correct, and many Democrats, especially Hillary Clinton, insist?  She and I never would have connected on a heart level or been able to share spiritual truths in a way that will mold our hearts not just for now but for eternity.

After work I wrote out the following notes and quotes to share with her so we can both use them as reference when either of us grow anxious or weary of the world.

The world may be broken, but He restores my soul.  The world is filled with evil and corruption, but He leads His people along paths of righteousness! (Psalm 23:2-3)

Violence and wars rage around us, but He is our peace. (Isaiah 9:6, Micah 5:5, John 16:33a)

Evil seems to be winning the current battles, but He has won the war. He has overcome the world. (John 16:33b)

Trials befall us; loved ones leave us, friends betray us; and injustices overwhelm us, but God's love never ceases and His mercies are new every morning. Great is His faithfulness! (Lamentations 3:22-23)

Rebounding Video: Imagine you are the top tennis ball, supportive like-minded friends could be the middle ball, and Christ is the basketball. 

Consider Daniel and Joseph who went from imprisonment or captive slave to second in command in pagan nations.   Mordecai is another example with some great humor to enjoy when you consider all the many instances of irony for proud Haman.  Ruth, Job, and Jonah have great rebound stories too.Any hardship or suffering we face will enable us to soar higher than we ever were before. Believe it. Claim it. See also Romans 8:28 and Jeremiah 29:11.

"The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I came that they may have life, and have it abundantly." -John 10:10 -NASB

(Note:  Just because Satan wants to kill and destroy does not mean that God will stop giving us abundant life.  Christ has already won the victory, and nothing can snatch us out of his hands, so we much choose to live in the knowledge of that truth.  We have to let the thief steal our joy.  God doesn't give the spoils back to the defeated one.  That's our choice.)

"I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world." John 16:33 

(IOW, Satan may seem to win a few battles, but God has already won the war!)

"Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things." - Philippians 4:8

(Note: Push out negative thoughts by filling your heart with positive truth - then there isn't any room for negativity.  God gives us lots of armor in Ephesians 6 but, he gives us one offensive weapon, the sword of truth or His WORD.  Conquer anxious thoughts with upper cuts, jabs, and thrusts of that might sword.)               

"I can do everything through him who gives me strength."  - Philippians 4:13

"Worry does not empty tomorrow of its sorrow. It empties today of its strength." Corrie Ten Boom

"I counted dollars while God counted crosses
I counted gain while He counted losses.
I counted my worth by the things gained in store,
But He sized me up by the scars that I bore.
I coveted honors, and sought for degrees.
He wept as He counted the hours on my knees.
I never knew till one day by a grave,
How vain are the things that we spend life to save.
I did not yet know, 'til a Friend from above,
Said richest is he who is rich in God's love."
(Author unknown) 

[My note - nothing we lose here on earth really matters in the big picture - it's all a blip on the timeline of eternity.]

"For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all." (1 Corinthians 4:17)

“Please help me not to be so busy making a living, I forget to make a life.” 

When I came home after that awesome work day, still riding the buzz brought the random acts of kindness, I came into the kitchen to find the kids working together...on their own initiative...happily preparing one of my favorite meals from scratch for dinner so I would not have to cook after a long but fruitful work day. Random acts of kindness are contagious and bring healing to the soul, so let's keep the RAK virus spreading across America where it is needed most.

Parenting Discovery: If kids see what you deem as a chore as a form of creative play and the decision to do that task is their own idea with the freedom to make whatever they want instead of being told to cook something you specify for dinner, then it isn't a chore they complain about, but rather, a fun project to enjoy - TOGETHER! 

Stream of Consiousness Ramblings: What is Love?

As the amount of hatred dominating headlines escalates out of control, I've been thinking about what love really is, given that hatred is the absence of love, just as darkness is the absence of light.  Our cultured tried to kick God out decades ago, so if God is love, it should come as no surprise that our culture is void of real and lasting love. To complicate matters, people can't seem to agree on what real love truly means. I've had some really good talks about current events and the expression of love with my daughter lately. 

My favorite parenting stage so far has been adolescence. I love that my daughter is at an age now where we can discuss or debate philosophical ideas using our own perceptions with a thoughtful respect for each opinion instead of me telling her what or how to view a situation, for she has a different personality and different set of spiritual gifts and is old enough to seek the Lord on her own for answers while challenging me in my own views.  It's so refreshing to see her tackling issues on her own, seeking the Lord for answers herself instead of letting me define right and wrong for her.  Now is the time when she gets to really own her faith, asking the Lord tough questions, seeking His word with prayer for guidance while still feeling the freedom to consult with me.  We still set firm boundaries for her, but the more she learns to let God lead her, the safer she will be. And the more she understands for herself why she believes what she believes, having experienced the Lord for herself, the stronger she will be when every media, university, and cultural voice tells her the opposite.  The degree to which students are indoctrinated is mind boggling, and I could not believe what I was hearing was true until I tried to have a civil, intellectual conversations with young people over something more removed from us as Brexit, much less heated issues closer to home.  They cannot think at all.  They can only feel.  Logic, reason, critical thinking are all absent from the minds of students coming out of universities today, although they can manage to memorize the insane lists of offensive terms forbidden on campus.  Free exchange of ideas is absent on campus anymore.  You either say what the regressive liberals want you to say or you shut up and get out.  Anyway, I digress....but knowing what my daughter is up against, and how disappointed she will be when she can't have an intellectual thoughtful discussion with anyone her age except those who came from classical schools or strong Christian families, I am relieved to see her engaging her mind and seeking the Lord for wisdom in a world of folly at only 12 years of age.  She'll be a force to reckon with when she graduates, I pray.

While my personality profile is strong on critical thinking, fact finding, defending absolute truth, and fighting for justice, she has enough mercy to make up for what is lacking in her mother, father, and brother combined. She is better at empathizing with the feelings of others, so I was curious to hear her definition of love. She quoted 1 Corinthians 13 to me, which is certainly a very good place to start.

 ^" If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. ² And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. ³ If I give away all I have, and if I deliver up my body to be burned, but have not love, I gain nothing.

⁴ Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant ⁵ or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; ⁶ it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. ⁷ Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.⁸ Love never ends." (1 Corinthians 13: 4-8)

What does love look like for something coming from a secular belief system?  If we are to tear down walls of bigotry and hatred, we need to understand each other better.  And we especially need to agree on what real love is, or at least understand the different definitions.

I take my definition from John 15:13, "Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends." Love is sacrifice, and I see Jesus' work on the cross as the greatest picture of love. So for me, love is a daily laying down of one's own comfort and forfeiting one's own desires for the betterment of another. For example, instead of letting my kids watch TV or play computer games all day, we have strict controls over what they watch and how long they watch it. We pay dearly for monitoring systems and sacrifice the convenience of free baby sitting screens provide to keep this limit enforced. We risk losing our kids' favor, and they do get mad at us when we remove screen privileges when they abuse them, but it's for their long term good. If I have a friend who I know is struggling with alcoholism and that friend wants me to join her at the bar  to celebrate her birthday, I will recommend another venue  (even if I had not chosen for myself to be a teetotaler for my own protection - cue Romans 14- not saying I would impose that man-made rule on anyone else, but I would highly encourage it for anyone with a history of alcoholism or addictive personality). When the time seems right, I would firmly but kindly confront her and help her get professional help. If I see a friend headed down any dangerous path, I will say the hard thing with as much grace as I can muster because I am willing to risk having someone not like me to save that person from destruction.

If I refuse to endorse or approve of someone's behavior, I am in no way suggesting that I think I am any better, nor am I ever implying I do not accept that person who was made in the image of God just like everyone else. I have my own struggles and expect a true friend to boldly confront me, helping me make choices that bring life, healing, and righteousness instead of accepting my poor choices out of a desire to be liked. I don't define people by their behaviors or choices just as I hope others don't define me by my worst behaviors or poorest decisions. According to my understanding of real love, it is terribly selfish to let someone destroy themselves out of fear you may offend them and then they may not like you. Love that approves of what is harmful is not love for anyone but yourself.  1 Corinthians 13:6 does say that love does not rejoice in wrongdoing, so given that fornication of any kind (pre-marital sex, adultery, or homosexualtiy) are clearly and repeatedly labeled as abominations to God, I cannot rejoice over a ruling legalizing gay marriage.  But love doesn't boast of being holier than thou or utter rude comments either.

I don't agree with all the choices any of my closest loved ones have made, and I certainly don't approve of the mistakes I've made in the past, but I am not defined by my mistakes, nor do I define others by theirs. I love them regardless. Love, to me, is unconditional, and irrespective of choices, but real love will risk everything (even offending someone) to protect and save the beloved one.

A more prevailing view on love in secular society is that to disapprove of even one behavior or lifestyle is not to love the person at all. That belief was central to the media wars against Chick-fil-a when they stood for traditional marriage. Yet CFA has sacrificed and served the gay community is many ways, like when they fed all the people in line in to give blood to save the victims from the Orlando shooting, to show they still love them, but for those who define love as accepting certain immoral though culturally in vogue behaviors, CFA will always be accused of hatred.

While intending no disrespect toward those who hold a different view of love, I do hope that someday, those who hold a secular view of love can at least understand that our view, while difficult to hear at times, is motivated out of love, or it should be. We mess up and say things we shouldn't when we speak from the flesh instead of being led by the Spirit of God, but I regularly ask myself these questions before I speak out.

Is it better to have lots of friends, having neither offended nor helped anyone, or to have only a few friends after spending your life helping others find spiritual freedom and climb to a better place?  What good is it to have 1000 people at my funeral if I reach heaven having never obeyed the last command Jesus gave his followers before His ascension?  The Great Commission had to be important if it was the last command Jesus gave making it one they could not forget.  He wasn't speaking to an audience of seminary graduates, ordained, and on staff with a megachurch. He was speaking to all his followers then and to you and to me now.

¹⁹ Go therefore and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, ²⁰ teaching them to observe all that I have commanded you. And behold, I am with you always, to the end of the age.”  (Matthew 28:19-20)

If I'm not sharing the gospel with others, teaching others His precepts, or helping others grow more mature in their faith for His Glory, then what is the point of my life?  If I'm only using my one and only life on earth to make others feel better here without any thought of eternity, then I've squandered my time on earth.  If I'm only saying what people want to hear so they will like me instead of saying what they need to hear to point them to Jesus, regardless of what they think of me, then I am only in love with myself.  If, however, I am faithful to whatever God has called me to do, and if I maintain an eternal perspective that compels me to lead others to Christ and to His righteousness with a humble, grateful heart and kind words filled with uncompromising truth no matter how they may reject me, persecute me, or isolate me, then I have lived a fruitful life. That's my take on love.

But with so many different love languages and definitions of love, how do we communicate love in a way all will receive it so as to build unity?  I don't want to build walls, but I can't let someone destroy themselves either.  Throughout my life, I'm sure I've built plenty of walls, but when someone wanted strength and truth, they have come to me.  I pray I can also give them kindness and mercy and compassion when they need that as well, but I know I err on the side of proclaiming God's word as absolute truth, and that may sound judgmental.  Thankfully the body of Christ is filled with those who overflow with mercy and goodness, gentleness and compassion (my daughter is one).  While continuing to do some serious work on my heart in those areas, I trust my almighty God to lead  seekers to those in the Body of Christ who can best glorify God in ministering to their point of need.

Here is another passage describing love in action:

"Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good. 10 Be devoted to one another in love. Honor one another above yourselves. 11 Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the Lord. 12 Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer. 13 Share with the Lord’s people who are in need. Practice hospitality.

14 Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse. 15 Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn. 16 Live in harmony with one another. Do not be proud, but be willing to associate with people of low position. Do not be conceited." (Romans 12:9-16)

How do I rejoice with those who rejoice if they are rejoicing in wrongdoing?   The context is set by the verses preceding it which instruct us to hate what is evil and cling to what is good.  Context is important here, and God would never rejoice in evil, so neither must we.  But we do need to keep any spiritual pride grounded by bowing at his feet, considering God's holiness compared to our worthless deeds, if we are to love in ways others can receive it.

"The problem with the liberal Christian is that he wants to downplay the existence of evil. Don't ask me to show compassion toward the evildoer if you refuse to acknowledge and condemn the evil. Downplaying evil does not make you my moral superior. It just makes you someone else's naive enabler."  (Mike Adams)

Access Ministry - Feb 2016

My daughter and I continue to take turns in Access Ministry as buddies to Z__, an adopted child from Taiwan with cerebral palsy and a number of other related issues (partially blind, has no independent mobility as is only able to use one limb, her left arm and hand).  Her parents have adopted three other children from Uganda (one with HIV) in addition to their two biological children (one with epilepsy).  They advocate for orphans and adoption around the world and helped start our special needs ministries at our church and at churches around the nation. It is such a privilege to work with this young couple and their precious children with big hearts.

When her family adopted her, the doctors looked at her brain scans and told them that there is little should would be ever be able to do for herself, but when I see her, I'm amazed at all the things she can do and in ways few others can. I never thought I could work with children or that children could like me, but when her face lights up upon seeing me walk in the room, all my fears, self-doubt, and excuses instantly disappear. She gave me the encouragement and inspiration I needed to teach children at our kids' school. No one has done that for me like she has. She remembers details of my life that only the closest family members would recall, and she delights to introduce me to her classmates as "friend". When the other children see how she feels about me, they ask to be my friend, too. I don't deserve your friendship, sweet Z, but I sure do treasure it. This drawing we made today was her idea, and I liked it so much I asked HER (b/c she is a smartphone pro) to take a picture of it with my phone.

Job Transitions

Yesterday was my first official day back to work with my last full time employer in over 9 years, and I showed up with a black eye (from a fight I had with the van door & gravity), covered with excessive eye shadow, and a hole in my blouse which I repaired with a hot glue gun while rushing out the door. Despite my disheveled appearance and only having worked there FT for 3 years and PT for 2 years before a 9+ year absence (to homeschool & be at SAHM), everyone who worked with me previously remembered me...not just by face, but by name. How is that possible? Lesson: Make the effort to remember faces and names, for it is a priceless gift you can give to someone else.

I think it was a great day, and I cannot believe I am getting paid to do this job (well except for fighting rush-hour traffic). I just hope all the unexpected perks and actually getting paid to simply learn new things at first (vs. spending 20 hours a week last year learning Statistics well enough to teach it without pay) does not skew my priorities. As a contractor, I expected to work out of my old briefcase with my old laptop (still singed on the corners from the time I accidentally set it on fire), providing all my supplies and equipment, but they gave me a small office - all to myself and a new laptop and 2 new monitors to use while I'm there.  I am treated like a regular employee with intranet access, company email, etc.  They even greeted me with a welcome sign.

I had to call my husband to take off work and go pick up the kids from school, however, so logistics will be a problem, especially when school is out, but at least I get to leave most of my work at the office instead of having it consume my life at home as teaching does. But does my work there make an eternal difference?  Teaching is very gratifying in that regard, but my family suffers from my dedication to it. Anyway - we shall see...for now I'm doing both plus tutoring, substitute teaching and number of other little jobs, so I must focus on finding the right balance. I feel very undeserving of this opportunity which will help pay for our trip to Israel, but I certainly do not want to be outside God's will for me.  Still, teaching does feel like a calling while this job feels like a gift.

Thursday was my last day of teaching STEM at homeschool enrichment camp. We wrapped up with a lesson on air pressure and a hovercraft prototype design competition.  Out of this sampling of hovercraft prototypes built in class today by 3rd-5th graders, which design do you think traveled the:
1) Fastest
2) Furthest?
3) Prettiest (for your right-brainers)*

*Actually, some STEM programs have added an art component and now call themselves STEAM since engineering design does have artistic elements.
 

The students and director made it hard to leave.  They wrote me really sweet notes like the one shown below and brought gifts.  Several lingered after class just to talk and to beg me to come back next fall.  The director told me that the person she had in mind as my replacement backed out, so now I feel guilty for leaving and have been asking others to consider the job in my place.  I didn't think they needed this program like our school's students do since so many homeschooling resources are rigorously STEM minded with strong emphasis on critical thinking skills, but these students really touched me with their kind words, homemade gifts, and lingering goodbye hugs.

Balancing This and That - Autumn 2015 Edition

Biblical Reflections
We can take great comfort in the truth that God has never contradicted His Word or His promises and never will. But are we comfortable when His purposes contradict our own plans and preferences?
 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Our church pastors have been working through a series on Romans 14, and it has really had me thinking. Staying centered (ie, walking the fine line between the countless ditches on either side of that line) feels much like an Indiana Jones movie as the enemy's chief strategy, at least for us moms, seems to be to constantly try to push us off that line into the ditches of one extreme or the other.
So I like the way Paul brings balance in this passage. As Brian noted, it is more important to have strong personal convictions based on personal Bible study, prayer, and the leading of the Spirit than it is to have flimsy convictions, for cultural, inherited, or half-hearted convictions will be absolutely insufficient when we stand before Lord and are held individually accountable on that day.

We must not, however, let our personal convictions about the NONESSENTIALS (which God has not clearly spelled out as righteous or sinful) separate us as a church body. For God can be glorified by differing convictions regarding nonessential matters. I love the balance in that passage and in the message delivered today.

Do you know why you hold the convictions that you do? Are you upholding them for the glory of God without causing division over disputable matters?

I have failed so many time in my witness to others by becoming too dogmatic over disputable matters.  Doing so burns bridges between the church and the lost while stirring up bickering among the brethren which also works to turn away the lost.  Love and grace must cover everything we do, and we must guard our words, especially on social media where written words are interpreted in a myriad of different ways depending upon the reader's current emotional state or personal circumstances, motives and theology, experiences and biases.  How many times have I labored over a written message with the goal of giving a friend loving encouragement only to have it received as a stabbing criticism?  How many walls have I built or bridges built either by careless words or totally by mistaken interpretation. While I continually pursue Biblical balance in all things, I know I need to focus on building the unity of the body of Christ, for I have a pattern of falling short as my passion for truth  and justice consume me.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I saw a headline the other day that expressed surprise when an atheist professor actually admitted what Christians knew all along regarding why atheists are so quick to ridicule and persecute Christ followers yet dare not say one contrary word about Islam. He doesn't fear Christians because they are a people of peace and forgiveness who are commanded to love their enemies and turn the other cheek, but he and his cronies are scared to death of extremist terrorists groups who think nothing of butchering all people (women and children too) who seem the least bit opposed to their belief system. So if you hate and kill those you call infidels, you are a protected class, but if you extend the love and mercy of God, you are despised.

What irony! So atheists are scared to death. All other religions hold their followers in bondage to fear of death and the afterlife, for they do not offer any certainty regarding one's eternal state. Yet, believing Christians have no fear or any man or of death, for our eternity is absolutely secure in Him apart from any works of our own.

4 “I tell you, my friends, do not fear those who kill the body, and after that have nothing more that they can do. 5 But I will warn you whom to fear: fear him who, after he has killed, has authority to cast into hell.Yes, I tell you, fear him! (Luke 12:3-5)

Parenting Keeps Me Humble
At dinner recent, my daughter prayed, "Thank you, Lord, for the potatoes, veggies, and whatever that other thing is on our plates....."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Does anyone from my generation remember those DAR patriotic writing contests from our school days? If a child voluntarily participated in that contest parents would be overjoyed by their child's patriotism and eagerness to write an essay. (I never participated because a few careless words by a teacher and/or a tendency to misconstrue words by my insecure little girl self convinced me I would never be a decent writer.)

From the moment my daughter received the flyer for a patriotic essay writing contest on the theme, "What Freedom Means to Me", she has been consistently nagging me to register her for the contest or working on yet another draft for her submission. Forget studying for tests this week...she only wants to write this essay which isn't due until November! Considering how much she disliked writing assignments during our homeschooling years, I should be overjoyed by her eagerness, but my enthusiasm is significantly tempered by the realization that she could not possibly win any such contest because her definition of freedom, while consistent with that of our founding fathers, is far different from the socially acceptable, politically correct definition today. And while parents are not allowed to assist with school projects or writing assignments at her school (and most parents during my childhood did not even consider helping as an ethical option), the winning essay for this contest will likely come from the "child" whose helicopter parent has the most writing experience. So, I guess I'll just keep encouraging her to write her very best essay for the glory of God but not for the purpose of winning any contest. Am I the only one conflicted over how to parent in a way that teaches them that life isn't fair and that few can be trusted without squashing their hopes and dreams? All we do and say should be for an audience of One anyway, but I sure do love watching my girl dream big.

Quotes To Ponder

"Truth, crushed to earth, shall rise again;
The eternal years of God are hers;
But Error, wounded, writhes with pain,
And dies among his worshipers."

The Battlefield (1839), st. 9 - William Cullen Bryant

Off Balance
I keep telling my husband that our world shifts out of balance whenever he is away on business trips. I'm the frugal planner, and he's the spontaneous one who doesn't mind spending money on things of great significance, so imagine how off center I was while he was away this week, given that I decided on a whim to buy all four of us our dream trip to Israel even though it requires pulling the kids out of school for at least 1.5 weeks. When daddy is away, Mama plans the grand getaway!!!! Yahoo! Let's go! Who wants to go with us? The more the merrier!

Balancing Priorities
When the kids came along and I realized how much of a full-time + OT job raising kids would be, I promised myself I would never work full-time while they were still home with me if at all possible. Desperate to give of myself and communicate with people outside of my own house, however, I have taken on various PT jobs or ministries over the years (rarely for money, though). As I am preparing to sign a contract for a PT consulting job which is the dream opportunity for me, I did some basic math. So why was I so surprised to discover that I am currently busying myself with 11 different PT jobs/ministries in 6 different industries while working under 5 different employers or ministry entities and serving over 131 clients? I am certified at time study, yet I never bothered to time-study myself? No wonder I'm worn out, eating junk, and barely sleeping. All those PT commitments add up to more than full-time!

Younger moms, beware of throwing yourselves into too many activities or responsibilities out of a false sense of obligation, need for adult interaction, or an escape from the monotony of SAHM-dom. Take time to measure your day and the value of each commitment you make. I had no idea I was so over-extended, but I bet my kids did! Find your passion and calling, but never forget your priorities. I may have made a career out of productivity improvements, but life balance is more important than getting stuff done. Changes are coming for me, for the sake of my health and my family, but school friends, I'm not letting go of STEM just yet.

Willing to Trade:  One bunny and a cat for a loving, loyal dog

The pets are making me crazy.  They are too much work, and are destroying my castle. If the kids and hubby did not love them so, I would totally be trading them in for a dog.

The rabbit doesn't clean herself very well, and our son is allergic to cat dander so both get baths each week.  Thankfully, our daughter has taken over this responsibility.  

 The After Bath

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
On most Saturday nights during my childhood, I remember sitting on the hearth watching refined television (Hee-Haw, ha ha), while my daddy combed out the tangles in my hair.  Now I find myself spending my Saturday nights grooming my bunny's tangled/matted rear end, at least during heavy shed season. That's not quite the full circle payback I imagined for myself.

Movie Stars
Rob Lowe shared the photo below on social media on October 31.  He was only five minutes from our house.   I think his son attends a nearby university.  Why didn't I instinctively grow nostalgic for 80s movies? It's only been 30 years since The Brat Pack became a thing, but I cannot imagine growing up without them. Hope you had fun at our new store, Rob and son, and I sure hope you were not as tempted to buy the horrid Bass Fish mailbox as my son and hubby were.

Teaching 
During a class on oceanography and bioluminescence, somehow the discussion took a very different turn with a student asking how we can prove that the earth is only thousands of years old as the Bible says and not millions of years old as scientists' claim, especially given that many scientists refuse to believe or accept that they could be wrong and ultimately accountable to a higher power.
How thankful I am for that OPEN DOOR to explain scientifically the flaws and false assumptions regarding carbon dating and to point to repeated scientific studies done that prove the error in such dating methods. The more we learn and discover about all of creation, the harder it becomes to honestly deny that all God's words are true!  I teach for a lot of reasons, but it's the little opportunities to encourage and strengthen the faith of our next generation that drives me to teach with such passion.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I get to talk with my hands, point fingers, draw funny pictures on the dry erase or smart board, crack jokes, dance, play games, create digital animations, take rides on a hovercraft, make messes, blow things up, preach the WORD, feel taller than all the other students in the classroom (a new experience for me), watch cute kids learn and reach beyond perceived limits, turn household objects into anything from a fun toy to a projection microscope, give and receive (side) hugs, look into faces full of enthusiasm and covered with big smiles...all while being close to my kids.

I'll be teaching a unit on air pressure soon.  My husband helped us out by building a human hovercraft as part of my object lesson.  When we resolved to never become HOVERING PARENTS (overprotective, controlling, stifling a child's independence and growth by preventing them from failing or taking responsibility for themselves), this is NOT what we meant. Hover on! ‪

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I love integrating so many different subjects into my STEM classes, but my favorite subject to integrate is Bible. I can't wait to show my students that the book of Job told us where the richest mineral deposits in the world (it specifically mentions copper ore), could be found over 3500 years before we had the technology to send ROVs there and find them just as foretold. That's just one of many beautiful passages we will examine during our study of geothermal vents. I've always viewed the Bible as a metaphorical treasure map, but it is literally as well.

Access Ministry
I asked my little access ministry buddy at church last week, "What's something really good that has happened to you lately?"

She responded, "CANDY!"
#myheart
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
She accessorized my face with stickers today. I forgot to take them off after Sunday School, so when I walked through the halls of church, I got lots of big smiles and warm greetings. Thanks for making me feel like a movie star, little buddy. You are officially hired as my personal stylist.

I want a life like his

I mentioned in the previous volleyball post that one of my daughter's teammates lost her father suddenly in late September to a brain aneurysm.  It was such a devastating life and shock to us all, for he was energetic, vibrant, healthy and so fruitful in ministry.  While we can't possibly understand the ways and timing of God or why He would take Ehud from his family so young in life, no one can deny how much God has worked that tragedy for good. (Romans 8:28)  I did not even know Ehud, but I knew his wife, for she was my son's music teacher for the past two years at school, and she was also a member of my Mighty Moms Monday morning muscle and movement class as well as a volleyball team mom.  She had the sweetest, gentlest, kindest spirit.  Their children are well respected as faithful, loving, kind Christ followers, so I knew he must have been a wonderful man.  Despite not knowing him personally, my daughter and I and countless others are forever changed by the way he lived his life.

His memorial service was the most Christ honoring and moving service I have ever attended personally and I could audibly feel the Lord's presence there, changing hearts and lives of others for eternity during the songs and testimonies giving all Glory to God for this man's walk of faith.  The strength and faith displayed by his wife, children, and dearest friends during the funeral at a time when they should be in despair was clearly a demonstration of the spirit of God.  They were much more focused on sharing Ehud's faith in Christ with others and casting his vision and light for the lost onto the thousands gathered than they were on their own loss.  They held back tears and spoke with power and might, yet with gentleness and humility.  They shared their confidence and trust in God's plans and purposes, even though their lives would never be the same and their loss was immeasurably great.  Their eyes were so fixed on eternity that the monumental loss was easier to bear, knowing it is only a temporary separation, and that Ehud is in the presence of His Lord.

On the morning before the  doctors confirmed his death to the extent that life support was removed,  I saw large crowds of students and teachers gathered in circles praying before school began and wondered what compelled such an outpouring of cries to God and intense emotion.  When I arrived at the weight room to set up for Mighty Moms, one of other moms in our class who is a close friend of Ehud's family, told me the news.  The last text she had received from Ehud's wife was "The doctor's will confirm his death one more time at 8am before harvesting his organs."  Imagine sending such a text only a few hours after serving together at church and watching him play ping pong with friends and family.

As I led a prayer with the other "Mighty Moms", we asked our God, who loves and cares for you all infinitely more the greatest human love, to sustain, comfort, and uphold Ehud's family and for His presence to overwhelm them with peace.  Soon after that prayer, a bird flew into the weight room and struggled to find it's way out until one of our animal loving moms gently picked up the bird into her caring hands and released it to soar outside once again.

Perhaps my analogy is far-fetched, but that bird's sudden entrance reminded me of the gospel hymn, "His Eye is On the Sparrow" and of the passage from which that song was written, Matthew 10:30-32.   It seemed as if the Spirit was saying, "Do not fear. I know and love this hurting family perfectly, and I have them cradled in the palm of my loving, strong hands. I will carry them to a place of peace and rest and show them the way out when they are ready to soar once more."

Grief is a burden much too heavy to carry. Because of Christ, we don't have to carry it alone, and I can see your family leaning so much into His loving arms.

Oddly enough, when I came to Mighty Moms the following week and turned on Pandora radio, the song, "His Eye is on the Sparrow" was the first song it played.  What are the odds of that?  His eye is on you, sweet family.  He told me so that morning. :-)

After the memorial service, I was so moved I shared the following:.

He only lived 46 years and had only been in our state for six of those years. He never sought fame or fortune, powerful positions, or public praise. He avoided center stage, choosing to serve tirelessly behind the scenes instead. He was a devoted father, faithful husband, dedicated disciple maker, missionary, Bible teacher, true and generous friend, son, brother, and a diligent worker/provider who offered himself as a living sacrifice each and every day, taking delight in serving others at every opportunity. He passionately served the cause of Christ while manifesting unconditional love, abundant joy, and unshakable peace found only through a close and personal walk with the Lord. His legacy reaches across the globe and deep into eternity.

So many people came to his funeral that the large church parking lot, the lawns of several homes near by, the Food Lion parking lot where a shuttle service ran, and the roads between them were all littered with vehicles. The worship center, every classroom, halls, foyers, and lobby areas were all packed to SRO as screens projected the funeral service into all those overflow areas. For almost three hours, people testified of his faith filled life and effective witness, giving God all the glory for choosing to work through him. One simple life surrendered to Christ impacted countless lives for eternity and the ripple effect will continue for generations. My daughter was deeply moved, and the only words she could find to describe her experience there were "I want a life like his." I do too, so let us not chase after the things of this world, but choose instead to live every moment intentionally for eternity.

As Jesus taught the lost religious leaders in Luke 10:37, "Go and do likewise."
Act justly, love mercy and walk humbly with your God. (Micah 6:8b)

I came home from the service and scrubbed bathrooms in service to my family.  That's the chore I like the least.  Meanwhile, my mentor high school math teachermade her husband's favorite meal for dinner which is something she detests.  We were inspired to serve.

I barely slept that night as I felt God calling me to follow Ehud's example.  So when I went to church the next morning where I serve in the Access Ministry (a buddy ministry which helps special needs kids integrate into the regular classrooms), I wanted to be intentional about serving this time as Ehud had been.

My Access ministry buddy with glasses and a magnifying glass

I wrote the following after serving at church that morning:

One of the themes from that moving memorial service I wrote so much about yesterday was to take every opportunity to love and serve, not because our all sufficient God needs anything at all that we can offer, but so that we can experience the great joy and blessing that comes through watching God at work in the lives around us. Still I could not understand how this one man could have given so much of himself every single day. Did he not grow weary, overwhelmed, or burned out? How did he so successfully juggle so many ministry responsibilities while keeping his priorities in the right order?

So today when I was "serving" in Access Ministry I realized that working with these amazing kids with special needs isn't a sacrifice or an obligation, and it no longer makes me tired. It is a joyful privilege.

How many times have I built towers with my own kids and not really been intentional about it or been totally there in body, mind, and spirit? They may have said "thank you" on a good day before smashing the tower into bits all over the floor. But when Zoe and I built a tower together this morning, I was all there because I was supposed to be "serving", and her face lit up with immense excitement as if we had just built the world's tallest and most beautiful skyscraper together. She gave me enthusiastic claps, more high fives than I can count, and smiles that melted my heart so much that I wanted to buy her all the LEGOs in the land and build her a tower to the moon. She taught me what I had been missing all those times I failed to intentionally serve my family, opting instead to merely go through the motions.

That's when I understood better why Ehud was able to live such a life of humble service. Serving others intentionally is not a burden, but a joyful privilege and a wise investment, for God is faithful to give back more joy and wisdom than your investment ever costs you. Serving is partaking in the riches of God's grace. I love you, Zoe, and I praise God for the way He glorifies Himself through you. Thanks for teaching me today. Thanks also for insisting that I take this photo to show your mommy because now I have a picture to remind me of all the ways you teach me.

These examples may seem small to you, but I did not even know Ehud personally.  Yet, I have been profoundly impacted by the overflow of the love in his heart.  What a privilege and blessing it is to know his family.

I found this devotional blog post from Proverbs 31 Ministires to be helpful as I prepared for the funeral. "Dealing with Deep Grief"

Youth Ministry, Teaching, and Parenting

Youth Group & Children's Life Class Ministries
Our daughter has officially aged out of the children's program at church and is now part of the youth group.  She's now enrolled in a small group Bible study led by two young women, a college student and a new college graduate.  She loves the leaders and has long had a precious hunger for God's word.  She also attends the large group Refinery meetings.

The kick-off social was held at a farm owned by some of our church friends.They dreamed of this farm for ministry purposes for years, so it's been exciting to watch them constantly hosting large groups.  The barn is a multi-purpose game room for youth, and the large pavilion fits long buffet lines and large crowds when it rains.  The pond is great for fishing or pontoon boating, and their animals are always fun to watch.

Our entire family got to attend the social, and it was such a treat to be "promoted" to youth group parents and get to participate in all their exciting adventures.

You know your 6th grader has just joined a large youth group when it takes over 10 acres to host them all for the kick-off event.

And you know our God is merciful when He pushes back the rain clouds all around us throughout the social while painting the sky with a magnificent sunset. Thanks to our hosts for the amazing hospitality as always.

 

Our church's children's Sunday School program had it's move up Sunday the week after Labor Day.  When our son moved up, the same teachers who had taught our daughter three years prior welcomed him to class.  When he told his sister that his teachers remember her, she responded, "Yea, I've been around the block a few times." #Tweens

Teaching
I recently began teaching STEM classes for a homeschool enrichment program held at a Christian camp 30 miles away.  I debated whether or not the long commute would be too much for such a commitment, but this place of ministry is powerful, and I felt like I should at least give back a little for all they've done to sow the gospel and Christian discipleship into the lives of youth across our community.

Approximately 19 years ago, I stood with a dearest friend and college roommate as she married her beloved husband at this camp where they met while serving as camp counselors, faithfully sowing God's word into the hearts of young people. They have been steadfastly serving together in multiple ministries ever since.

At the camp's open house, I found myself standing right beside her once again as our i display tables "just happened" to be placed side-by-side. Thank you, precious friend, for your Godly example, devotion to ministry, abiding friendship, persistent prayers, and tough love all these years as our paths have intersected in such unique ways. What an honor it is to be joining you on staff this time. 

When two beautiful deer"welcomed" me at my classroom door that day, I knew my friend was right all along about this place of ministry. 

Hello deer!

I absolutely love my little classroom cabin in the woods. It's the ideal setting for developing astute observers, explorers, discoverers, and worshipers of the One who made it all "and saw that it was good".

Parenting
Midterm grade reports were released recently, and our kids had very different reactions.  Our daughter has moved up to middle school where letter grades are on a 10-point scale. Our son is still in grammar school which uses a 6 point scale.  As usual, they made almost the exact same grades, but one number they had in common was an A for her but a B for our son.  She was in tears with herself for getting a low A, while our son seemed completely unconcerned about his B, though we all know he could have scored better if he had not rushed through his assignments.  She is obsessed with grades, so she likes it when subjects are easy for her.  Our son is still bored out of his mind in class and only wants to be stimulated. Sometimes to break the monotony, he'll divide or multiply the problems instead of adding and subtracting them because he's so sick of addition and subtraction problems again when he was doing long division and pre-algebra at home years ago.  I feel for him, but he also needs to honor God by following the instructions and giving his best.  Similarly our daughter needs to honor God by giving her best instead of honoring herself by trying to be the best in the class.  So we parent them differently.  I can most relate to my daughter because I put entirely too much pressure on myself in school as she does even though my parents seemed to care less about my grades.  The pressure came within, and nothing they could say could change how seriously I took my studies.

So I tried to speak to her heart once again, trying to convince her not to be so hard on herself when she doesn't reach the unrealistic expectations she places on herself. I sent up an arrow prayer for God to open her eyes and help her see what a beautiful treasure she is, not because of what she accomplishes, but because of who He says she is and because of what He is doing in her heart and in her life. God is glorified when we give our best for Him, regardless of how we measure up by our own standards or those of others. Parents, relatives, and churches may preach these truths and make every effort to ease others' anxieties, but the battles still rage within as the culture's influence presses harder.

After my prayer, these words from a book by Beverly Lewis suddenly struck me:
"Finishing well in life is not so much about being the best or the greatest at something but rather, embracing lowliness of heart, laying down one's life."   That quote reminded me of Matthew 20:16, “So the last will be first, and the first will be last.” - Matthew 20:16

Speaking of parenting, I've been thinking and writing frequently about helicopter parenting.  We have a few of those at the school, and I'm sure I've been one at times.  Lately, I find myself just not having enough energy left to hover or micromanage their lives even if I wanted to.  Tough love and natural consequences are the theme these days, but I pray I'm balancing the relinqu of their responsibilities to them to handle with enough loving support.  This article resonated with what I'm seeing at school among anxious students and with what I'm trying so much to avoid with my naturally driven first born.  "Kids of Helicopter Parents are Sputtering Out"