Conversing with kids

The purpose of this post is to provide yet another sampling of the cute and often crazy conversations we have with our children.


When my husband was away for the night on a camping trip with our daughter, I casually mentioned to my 5-year old that I don't like it when the man of the house is away at night.  Then my little boy put his arms around me and said, "Well, I guess that means I'll have to protect you tonight, Mom." And so he did. ♥

Growing tougher by playing football with Dad

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I recently tested a new bacon and cheddar baked chicken recipe.  When it was ready, I put on the oven mitts I always use and pulled the pan out of the oven.  As soon as I lifted it out of the oven, I could feel my fingers burning.  I wanted to drop the hot dish immediately, but I did not want to ruin three pounds of chicken or my hardwood floors.  By the time I set the pan down on the stove top surface, my fingers were singed.  I wish there was an easier way to know when oven mitts have lost their protective quality and must be tossed in the trash.   After lots of icing and experimenting with various home remedies for burns, I learned that soy sauce works best for taking the sting away.

Later that evening as I was tucking my compassionate little boy into bed, he asked, "Mom, does your burned hand feel better yet?"

I replied, "A little. Thanks for your concern. Is that why you you have such a sad expression on your face?"

He nodded and said, "Yes, it's just that you have so many other hurts that the burn seems to be too much!"  

That boy is so easy to love!

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Our first grader is loving his new school so much that sometimes I feel a need to point out some of the benefits he is still reaping because of our time spent homeschooling.  After I recently noted one such example, he replied, "But our school has lots of benefits, too.  I have so much fun there.  I have made new friends, and it looks like you have, too, Mom."  He has seen me on the phone and at the school chatting with the other school's "room mom", so I guess I have found a new friend after all.  She is a precious answer to prayer, too.

Dressed as Abe Lincoln at school with one of his new friends

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Our daughter also continues to relish her time at school.  Our family has had some exceptionally hectic weeks lately, so I was feeling overwhelmed when my daughter kept asking me to do this, that, and the other thing.  So, I finally told her that I simply could not do ALL of that with her in one evening.

Our daughter and her favorite school friend accidentally dressed alike.

Seeking to offer me some perspective, she said, "Imagine what it would be like if you had 17 kids."

I replied, "Now I know we have friends with 6, 7, 8, and even 9 kids, but who do you know who has  17 kids?"

She answered, "My teacher, Mrs. Amelia*!  Well, it's like she has 17 kids for over six hours a day, 4 days a week.  And some of her kids are really hyper, too!"

Later, Amelia* told me that she had used a similar analogy when trying to teach her high energy students to be calm and orderly and to show respect for others.  She had said something like, "Now imagine having 17 kids in your family.  With 17 kids in a family, it's pretty important to consider how your actions not only impact you, but also how they impact everyone around you."

*Name changed to protect her privacy and to prevent other school administrators from trying to take the world's best teacher away from our school! 
 
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I love that child development stage when children first begin learning to talk.  They try to repeat whatever they hear but often mispronounce it.  Our children have mostly outgrown that phase, but yesterday, my son mispronounced a word in a way that gave the message an entirely new meaning.  It is probably too inappropriate for this blog but still funny enough for me to want to record for future chuckles. So stop reading now if female sanitation offends you.

Dinner was ready, but the kids were focused on their school work, so I debated whether or not to hold the meal or serve it right away.  I stated, "Dinner is ready. Should I dish it out now or later?" 

 Our 5-year old answered, "Douche it out now, Mom!"

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Okay now....with that verbal slip-up, perhaps I should introduce the kids' latest "invention".  They call it the  "human muzzle".  Patent is pending. :-)  They thought it was hilarious and happily posed for pictures to use in "advertising".  Thankfully, this chip clip doesn't hurt.

Our daughter's teacher teased, "I'll take 17 for a little classroom..."  Our daughter, thinking she was serious, asked, "How much?"  They decided they should negotiate.