Our love story (part 2): Long distance romance

Our long distance relationship continued during the rest of that first year in college, but since he was in lock-down as a plebe, I did not get to see him again until summer break.  He came back to my hometown for a short visit before traveling over 1000 miles to his parents' home for the summer.  I think my parents were ready to arrange a marriage between us by the end of that visit.  He was such a mannerly, intelligent, respectable young gentleman and probably more than my parents had ever hoped for me to find in a mate.   Of course, we were only 19 years old, so marriage was not even a consideration at that point.

I nearly fell to the floor in shock when my dad let this young suitor borrow his brand new Ping golf clubs and even gave him enough cash to cover his green fee and a golf cart so that I could take him golfing. Unfortunately, I had zero interest in golf and even less ability to swing a golf club, so I sat in the cart and watched him play.  I was an avid runner, but after enduring plebe summer, running was not something he classified as an enjoyable hobby. I was interested in him enough to watch him play golf, and he cared enough about me to go running with me even if he viewed running as a form of punishment.

One evening during that visit, my aunt and uncle invited us to a memorable dinner at their home nestled beside a private lake.  Their home resembles a romantic style Swiss chalet, and their property is so beautiful and tranquil.  We enjoyed time out on the lake and a delicious steak dinner together.

My uncle placed us in this embarrassing pose which made me blush, yet that photo taken on their dock ended up being a family favorite.

He left again all too soon, and I began packing for my summer study abroad.  He wrote me at Oxford University that summer, and I called him as I traveled to share with him about my adventures.  During the following years, he sang with the USNA glee club at some of the same cathedrals I had told him about through my letters and phone calls. He soon began traveling much more extensively than I ever would, but unfortunately for him, much of his traveling was done hundreds of feet below sea level.

I flew back home from England just in time to join my family for our annual beach trip.  For the past six or seven years, they had allowed me to bring a friend on these trips, so I chose my favorite midshipman as my guest. That vacation occurred just before his scheduled return to the Naval Academy, so he was able to join us on his way back to school.   His skin had darkened a lot over the summer making me more curious about his Cherokee heritage.  I thought it was interesting that my mother is a direct descendant of a famous cowboy while he is the grandson of a famous Cherokee Indian.

Playing card games at the beach in 1992

We made some interesting memories that week.   By then, I had discovered so many wonderful things to love about him, and we had many of the really important factors in common.  We were both raised in healthy, loving homes in which our parents were committed to their respective marriages for life and devoted to their children.  We had both grown up in similar denominations and had been thoroughly involved in church throughout our youth.  We both had committed our lives to Christ and had similar goals and dreams.  Our political, social, and economic values were also consistent.  We even both got to speak at our high school graduation ceremonies because we shared a similar passion for academics.

Over the course of that week, he appeared more attractive to me than ever, and he treated me with amazing courtesy.  He fit into our family well, and I loved spending time with him.  His easy going personality complemented my more intense nature and gave me the balance I needed.

Yet, God was sending me red flags!  He was saying "no" to our relationship, and I tried not to listen.  Back then, I didn't realize that God's "no" sometimes means "not yet".

After the beach trip, we each returned to our respective colleges, but I did not have peace about my relationship with him.  Thankfully, back at school, I was quickly immersed into fellowship with a host of amazing and mature Christian men and women.  My passion for small group Bible studies grew as I began co-leading a small group Bible study for the first time.  My college Sunday school teachers poured out their hearts, souls, wallets, and very lives into the spiritual nurture of our college group which was in the process of growing from 20 to 200.  My daily personal quiet times with the Lord grew so much more intimate.  I heard the Lord speak more clearly than ever before that fall, and He was telling me to break off the relationship with my favorite midshipman. 

To be continued....

Click here to continue to part 3.
To go back to the beginning of this love story, click here.